I need to apologise for the delay in this post. I had planned to publish this a week ago but life and work got in the way and writing ended up being low on my priority list. This draft sat in an uncomplete state for a few days and I simply couldn’t focus for long enough to finish it. I need to get it together! I do believe that everything in life happens for a reason (even when it comes to my procrastination) and this post needed the few events that occurred this week to happen before coming to fruition. I had to let it simmer before it was ready to serve. Before I get into it, can you believe it’s August already? Soon Christmas decorations will be hitting the stores and we’ll be winding down to the silly season. Time flies!
“Surround yourself with the dreamers and the doers, the believers and thinkers, but most of all, surround yourself with those who see the greatness within you, even when you don’t see it yourself.” - Edmund Lee
I took a moment and thought about the people I’ve spent time with this past month alone and whether I think our interactions were positive or negative. An easy way to gauge this is to think about my drive home. After hanging out with friends who vibrate with positivity energy I feel inspired, happy, confident and upbeat. After hanging out with negative Nancy’s I found myself second guessing myself on decisions I’ve already made, feeling low and just wondering if I knew what I was doing with my life. Why would I want to feel like that all the time? Friendships and relationships need to be symbiotic, both people need to bring out the best in each other. Sometimes that means having tough conversations and other times it just means supporting your friend and giving him/her a shoulder to cry on.
As much as the focus is on surrounding yourself with people who add value to your life, you need to be the friend and partner who adds value to other people's lives too. Don’t be that friend that takes and never gives. Don’t be that friend who never supports and cheers your friends on. Don’t be that friend who’s alway criticising and tearing people down. Just the other day I had a conversation about dating and I mentioned how my next relationship needs to be with someone with whom we are both each other’s number one fan. We need to be each other’s biggest cheerleaders and I need to be with a man who realises we’re on one team. I have his back and he has mine, no questions about it. It’s the same with all relationships (friendships included). Be your friends' biggest fan and add value to their lives, in the same way that you expect them to be your biggest fan.
About the Look
I remember saying to Keagan while shooting this look that I felt like I was going to church in this outfit. Church lady vibes! Jokes aside this is one of my favourite skirts at the moment. The way it fits my waist, the way it hits my leg just below the knee, and the zip all the way up the front! Très chic! I can’t help but feel like a lady while I’m in it.
Outfit Details:
Photographed by @KeaganKingsley
Drinking tea and thinking long… that is the effect of this blog post on me. I’ve sat down and thought really long, really hard and quite realistically about the relationships I feed, and… thank you. Just thank you. Have a smashing new week!
Author
Hi Nomalanga. Thank you for taking the time to read this. I felt like I simply HAD to share. You’re welcome!
aah, great read! question is how do you practically get yourself out of the whatsapp group, the dead same old non-building convos. Those non-dreaming friends who feel like everyone should be the same, we must all complain but not really make any changes because ”that’s how our lives are”…..do you slowly pull away, ignore their messages & they’ll get the ‘memo”…..then there’s a fear of ‘loneliness’ when you are in between friendships:) trying to build new connections. I may sound rather strange but I think most people ‘keep bad friendships’ because they don’t know how to end them…..
Author
HI Princess. No, you’re not strange. These are normal concerns to have. With WhatsApp groups that I feel like are a waste of my time, I simply remove myself. When asked what happened I replied the constant notifications were annoying me. You can still get in touch with me if you like 🙂 Simple, and no one gets hard feelings. On the pulling away part, that is hard. You don’t want to make it seem like you think you are better than anyone but you need to be selfish to grow yourself. Start spending more and more time with new people who feed you and grow you and you’ll start to notice that you don’t have time for the drainers and depressers. Good luck!!!
I have been thinking the same thing for the past couple of months also. I have recently as last year been very true to my feelings about people and have let go of a lot of “friends” that don’t serve me in turn has me not serving them to the best of my abilities. Will be sharing this with my small group of girls. Plannign a trip away soon this will make for a great round the fire convo.
Thank you boo and keep it.
This touched me, you have no clue.
Author
Hi Neo, Thank you for reading! Spread the word, it’s the only way we’ll grow and grow each other. Enjoy your trip!!